back in the wiesbaden woods.
it was hard returning from our beautiful poland travel experience to wiesbaden, as it also meant going back to work. but as soon as i am going through the motions of daily stress again i will eventually need to go back to nature to level myself, to gain new energy. i am very glad that wiesbaden is surrounded by the extensive forests of the taunus mountains. i think, it's one of those things that keep me here, so far away from my family, because this region is beautiful and has so much to offer, so many secrets, so many places that are a feast for the eyes, tiny villages to uncover, but also small cities to explore. it's not only the taunus mountains, but also the wine-making regions of the rheingau and rheinhessen that lure you in with their sunny beauty and the big cities as well, like frankfurt or mainz, with all their interesting architectural histories and the opportunities to learn something new. aside from not being overly happy with my job, i am happy to be able to live here, though.
if it weren't for my job, i would've never made it to this place and therefore would've never seen all the places i've seen, made all the experiences i made, and therefore would've never developed the interests i have or got to know what i like and don't like and learn so much about it all ( and about me ). yes, sometimes it's hard to not be close to my loved ones. sometimes it's hard to be a loner in a city and not being able to connect well with people. sometimes it's tough that i got no one to back me up when i am down because of work. sometimes it hurts having to discover all of that on my own, not being able to properly share it with people that appreciate things the same way as you do. but all in all? i have the freedom to explore at my own speed, not getting hindered by anyone if something peculiar strikes my eyes and i wanna go explore, not being shamed for always stopping and taking photos. i can read and learn how much i want to, no pressure from somebody calling out for me to hurry the fuck up, or that they're hungry and tired and want to go home.
in this regard, i would say i am receiving a rare gift, the gift of unadulterated freedom (and privilege, let's not forget that). i can go wherever i want to, whenever i want to and as long as i want to and i don't have to keep anyone's needs in my mind. i think that's a damn good gift, learning to be alone with yourself and not be bored or seeking out constant distractions. yes, in a way this freedom is also a way of finding distraction from the everyday life, but it's also a way to show you that there's more out there than struggle and work and having to deal with annoying people. doing this on my own... it often feels a lot more peaceful than when i am going out together with people. i can breathe lighter. i can focus on details differently.
sometimes it is nice to see the world with other people, though, and get to know how they see it with their eyes. everyone is different. it can be fun, especially when the circumstances are right and there's a shared interest at least. so travelling with my parents might mean, we can take long ass day trips to somewhere, walking our feet off. taking a trip with a friend to a museum might mean we get to bond over a specific subject in a deeper way. going to a big city with a loved one can give you a feeling of not feeling lost in it and discovering together, seeing it through the eyes of the other person. well, if they are willing to go on that experience with you, that is. and while that is not often the case, and sometimes can be frustrating when you desperately want to share with someone what you are able to witness and it isn't something that you are able to do, it still is worth it for all the times you are lucky to have someone who loves the same things as you. which, as i often think to myself, is quite a rare and special thing to happen and something one should definitely appreciate more.
on the topic of privilege, i realize that a lot of people are not able to see the world as i do. they are not able to hop in their car and drive somewhere every week to flee / enhance their regular lives. be it because of heavy corona restrictions or health issues ( mental, physical ), be it because of simply not being able to afford the means to get out of their place of living, or that they might be stuck in a living situation that does not allow any respite from its demands or responsibilities ( or, to go into even darker realms - that have to do with social issues, fear, marginalizations etc. ).
that's why i know i should feel more grateful about everything in my life. sometimes i forget that i am very lucky to live a relatively calm life aside from my job ( that despite being high pressure and full of crazy demands, earns me the money that helps to seek out my solitude more often ). i forget that being and craving to be alone can be a blessing, especially now that the corona virus loves to turn up our society that is so very much founded on human interaction and our need to gather and mingle. because that way, i am not at risk to meet up with possible carriers that might infect me, which means i am not the same risk for others. i mean, yeah, it could still very well happen at my job anyway, i work in an environment where there are plenty of people coming into contact with me, even though of course i am very much carefully following the covid rules as good as i can. but outside of that environment? i am pretty solitary and rarely meet people, and if i do, i know exactly that these people are going about it the same way as i do - thanks for family and friends that i can trust on this completely.
you might wonder, though, woman, why do you struggle with your need of solitude? if you like it so much, you should embrace it more. it's funny that i struggle with it, because everytime i have been interacting with most people i feel depleted of energy and worthless compared to them and annoyed and kind of ashamed of myself and fake. so of course i should be glad to be on my own and feel better about it. but that's the thing, too. there's a guilt gnawing at me that i should also be more social and connect to people so i can experience 'being human' at a more full scope and variety. and there's a feeling of missing out as well, like, what would it be like to actually have a healthy relationship where both parties just fit well together, like a puzzle piece and are telling each other how they feel and what they think without feeling guilt or shame or fear that you might hurt someone with your thoughts ( i realize that's a very rare occasion, lol ). what would it be like if i had a family of my own, a kid to raise, would i love it, would i adore this way of life? what would it be like to connect with friends in a way that makes them life-long companions and that don't make you feel like you are putting up an act and hide your feelings to not hurt them with your bitterness and your insecurities? what would it be like to have all the experiences society is telling us to have, because they are 'fulfilling' and 'necessary' and 'just how life is supposed to be'?
not fitting in somewhere makes you feel alone, even if you are a person that loves solitude, that feels weird around people, that's introspective. so maybe that's actually what i am struggling with, not being able to truly connect to someone that would make me feel like i am actually fitting into even the tiniest social circle ( a circle of two ). don't get me wrong, i love my family, i love my friends, but i always keep feeling an emotional distance to them ( i realize it's maybe also because i am physically distant from them ). maybe it's another thing i am struggling with. my emotional distance to the people i like and love, which in turn brings up even more guilty emotions within me.
so, you see, it's not a simple answer i am searching here. the question in itself is already difficult to entangle. on one hand there's depletion that comes with having to deal with other human beings. on the other hand you want to communicate and interact, because you feel like it could be beneficial to you at some point. even though you know clearly how much it leaves you struggling. on one hand you love your solitude and are happy to indulge in it, but on the other hand you also want to share that wonderful feeling with someone and feel the same calmness and relaxation with them, as when you are on your own. sounds incredibly romantic and probably also super naive. because you know that a tranquility like this only exists in very rare moments in anybody's lives.
and you think again... funny, how we all know that our needs and wishes are rarely met fully with anybody we ever meet, but we still wish for the perfect buddy and friend and partner. and how we delude ourselves with that, when in fact we should start 'working with the material' we have on offer. and even that in itself is super problematic, isn't it? like it indicates you want to change what might not want to be changed, and what might just want to be accepted for what it is and loved for it. such a dilemma to solve.
and with that confusing monologue let's just dive in to see some pretty pictures. from a walk in the woods of north-west wiesbaden, near the tiny district of alt-klarenthal.
the wiesbaden woods in summer are promising early autumn's fruit - blackberries.
discovering the souls of trees.
drumstick alliums create the most beautiful blue fireworks 😍
a green jungle...
i sat down near this wood for a while to rest a bit and take in the sounds of summer in the forest. there were mice scurrying around underneath the dried out leaves and the mossy branches and from time to time you could see a tiny tail or a little snout poking out from there as well, sniffling out whether the air was clean enough to continue their path to whatever destination they wanted to head to. birds are chirping way up high in the trees and the chirping of crickets is also a constant companion during this season. and in the distance, always part of any landscape near a city, is the sound of human beings rushing by in their own cars to their own destinations.
this is actually part of a bike trail where you can do some jumping tricks and generally get dirty or have fun when you're a biker.
a cute little villa on the edge of the city.
beech trees always making an impression on me.
i mean, they can be so massive and huge!
this place is a hidden ( but not forgotten ) gem i have already stumbled over yeeeeears ago ( i can't even remember the first time anymore ). these walls were once an old shooting range from wehrmacht times ( around 1930ies to 1940ies ). in modern times they aren't used as such anymore, but instead draw sprayers, youth and bikers near who love to frolic around and get creative. it's pretty interesting to me how these walls lead a semi-forgotten life, the city's not really interested in preserving or researching about their history and so they can continue to just sit there, without anyone really knowing what they are supposed to represent. at the same time they are used as a canvas for street art, sometimes even pretty amazing work, and they seem to be loved as a roaming space for kids of all ages, kind of breathing animating and lively air to the place.
to see such bright and colourful shades in a place like the woods, where everything is uniformly green and brown normally, it surely adds a special atmosphere.
heda LGBTQ - a code of the modern youth.
ruff'n tuff they like it 😂
these walls are about 10 to 20 meters long ( there are several of them ).
loved discovering minimal and more abstract art on the walls as well.
or the elaborate ones! 'you can run... but you can't hide!'
black ops wiesbaden is a club that plays airsoft - a competitive team shooting sport. it seems like they used the shooting ranges for their activities at some point and to commemorate that, they left behind this skillful mural.
unfortunately, the trees are sometimes sprayed on as well.
made my way back to klarenthal after a while, passing by some idyllic clearings.
this borough once belonged to a big monastery ( from 1298 to 1599 ), the only one in the whole of wiesbaden actually! you can't find a lot of it anymore, though, only some leftover walls and spolia. after it's been secularized in 1559 it was used as a place for industrial production ( paper, glass ), during which it burned down several times. therefore the only thing that still reminds you of the monastery is the name of the district ( which is subdivided into an old and a new one ). the monastery had been a woman's only monastery, it was lead by the order of poor ladies, or poor clares. and since the monastery resided in a small valley ( german: tal ) it was named klarenthal.this house has nothing to do with the monastery, only that it stands in close vicinity to where it once stood. i just kinda liked the facade of it, taking some villa elements and incorporating them into an otherwise 'simple' building style.
on a totally different note, let's also check out some pictures of a walk i had through mainz later on! i actually want to visit mainz more often, but rarely get around to. i think it has something to do with the fact that cities are quite crowded and i am not particularly drawn to that ( even more so since the virus appeared on the screen ^^; ). and also it might have something to do that i still associate mainz with a past relationship and it feels a bit bittersweet still. even though it's only a tiny pang, to be honest. mainz still interests me as a city and i know there are probably more wonderful places to discover, in all of the districts. maybe i'll make a little trip there soon, i feel like i really should satiate my hunger for architectural explorations at some point again. the year 2020 wasn't that big a year for me in that department 😅
some of the traffic lights in mainz boast 'mainzelmännchen' figurines, and it's the cutest thing. these are comic figurines that are very well-known in germany as they are often shown on the german public tv broadcaster ZDF. 
and a red one to stop you from crossing the street ;)
starting my little mainz walk at the rhine river banks, namely the stresemannufer! in the back you see the theodor-heuß-brücke, a bridge linking wiesbaden's districts mainz-kastel and mainz-kostheim with the city of mainz.
and into the other direction you could see the maaraue and the südbrücke leading to ginsheim-gustavsburg.
this tiger statue is a work of the mainz artist philipp harth from 1936 (!) and overlooks the rhine since 1969.
another sculpture on the stresemannufer is herbert mehler's VITA ( 2014 ). it's actually made out of weathered steel, but here i caught it in a rather shadowy state!
several of these gates grace the rhine banks of mainz, once having been fortified gates ( mainz had always been a fortress city until it was destroyed in world war 2 ). this one here is called templertor ( templar's gate ).
the same gate from the other side. it was built in 1837.
close nearby this villa caught my eye, especially the art in the mezzanine. the villa itself is a wilhelminian one from 1888, but the painting is supposedly from the 1930ies ( which i was suspecting already because of the fact that there were smoking modern factories depicted on it and the people all wore fashion typical for the time - i only dated it a little earlier to the time of the 1920ies - it reminded me too much of art deco paintings ).
i wonder what the story about this house was, and why it ended up with a depiction of a time that did not belong to its construction date? depicted were scenes of a factory worker toiling away...
... and of a potterer creating crockery...
... and fishermen going about their work by the sea / or river? i really wish i knew what the symbolism of these frescos is supposed to tell us, but i guess that's a secret that only someone with insight could tell us, and i am not that person ;)
directly on the other side of the street the fort malakoff is one of those last fortress remains that mainz still can show us from those times it was heavily fortified. it is a structure called caponier, which was used to fire against combatants from within. it is now a bar which belongs to close nearby hyatt regency hotel.
fort malakoff and its bar terrace. in the back you can see the hyatt regency hotel.
the hotel was built in 1997 by JSK architects ( now GBP architects ). it integrates the fort into its hotel grounds, offering hotel guests a spectacular bar experience ( that's also open for people that are not hotel guests ).
the whole area is always pretty busy so i quickly moved forwards to flee the people 😂
ended up at the winterhafen housings ( built from 2010 to 2013, HKR architects ).
there were some swan babies swimming in the harbour of the winterhafen, watching them definitely made me feel more calm and grounded again.
kinda liked this little motor roller scene.
mirroring clouds inside the DB cargo BTT building.
it's not a building that looks like much, but a glass facade is always pretty interesting to me, just for the reflections alone!
another remnant of the fortifications: the casemates of the former st. francis bastion. there's a restaurant ( citrus ) inside now, but it has also been used as a market hall in the 19th century. in the forefront is the entry into the DB cargo BTT building ( it's a forwarding company of the deutsche bahn cargo ) and in the back you can see part of the actual DB cargo HQ.
inside the holzstraße the holzturm ( wood tower ) wins you over with its clean white walls and the bright orange brickstone corners. it dates back to the 15th century and is a late gothic example of medieval fortifications.
also found on holzstraße: this gorgeous relief of a big bird flying. found it on the facade of the mainz university of applied science's department for communication design. the building is from 1955, i think. couldn't find much info about it, only that the university is going to move out and into a new building in 2022, which will endanger this building to have no purpose anymore and maybe get torn down.
the building wasn't in a very good state either, it definitely looked like it could use a little touch-up, but i guess that's not needed anymore when you have the perspective of moving into a new place ( and it's not listed as a landmark ). i think it would be a bummer though, to lose the reliefs should it come to demolition.
a few streets further the fischtorbrunnen ( fish gate fountain ) bubbled happily and gave the fischtor square a relaxing atmosphere. it was built in 1930/31 by rudolf schreiner.
i do love a good vehicle meets cool neighborhood situation and this was definitely one of those! the lauterenviertel ( lauteren neighborhood ) in mainz is full of these lovely wilhelminian townhouses, which is actually worth mentioning as mainz lost a great portion of its original citylandscape in the second world war. unlike in wiesbaden where you are flooded with these houses and villas, mainz only has very few neighborhoods ( another one in the neustadt district ) of those sophisticated looking buildings left.
leaving the historic-looking district behind, i made my way to a very special building right by the rhine river: the town hall. it is special because it was designed by someone super famous, the danish architect arne jacobsen together with otto weitling! the town hall is a functionalist gem from the 1970ies ( built from 1970 to 1974 ) and has been the subject of a lot of disputes and discussions. it is definitely a monumental behemoth, almost brutal in its execution, but it also eminates an atmosphere that speaks of courage and audacity, something that is actually distinct to mainz citizens. unfortunately the building did not age well, it is heavily damaged and needs to be repaired, which created a huge discussion if it's even worth repairing as the costs could warrant an entirely new city hall. the only facts speaking for the repair of this interesting architecture is that it is a project of a world-renowned architect and the certainty that a new city hall would even be more costly as the repair of the old one. plus, the architecture is really something remarkable, i'd even go as far to say it's pretty much iconic. i feel like mainz would lose a prominent building for a probably more generic-looking one ( because let's face it, contemporary architecture is rarely spectacular or eye-opening ).
i am glad to report that the government of mainz decided to repair the town hall and will bring it up-to-date with modern standards ❤ i only did take photos of the building as seen from the rhine promenade, but you can check out the link i provided for more pictures of the main facade! also, i have made photos of the building before, though they provide a more distant perspective, as i shot them from the other side of the rhine river ( check out this blogpost ). i guess i need to return eventually and take some frontal pictures as well!
the town hall is sometimes called 'prison for public servants', which i find pretty charming ;) and you can totally see why!
the windows are covered with 'jail' gratings.
tiny gap - a walkway that leads up to the inner courtyard ( which was fenced off due to marble plates falling down ).
the marble facing is my favourite detail and it fits so well with the gratings, don't you think?
i just really love the different structures and patterns of this building ❤
next to the city hall is the rheingoldhalle, another brutalist building ( built from 1965 to 1968 by heinz laubach ). that multifunctional hall has not really been on my radar yet, there was never really something special about it that took my interest. while i went around the corner of it, i discovered something that actually did catch my eye, and it was this little corner. okay, i realize, there's still nothing super special about it, but i did like the concrete cuboids stamped into the concrete. just a tiny detail, but enough to wake my sensors for cubist/abstract design elements 😅
a tiny detail again, this time from the front side of the town hall - the big clock that was integrated into the town hall wall with differently coloured marble slaps! ( a shame i haven't made more pictures of the building while i was there, really ).
an overhead bridge is leading to the jockel-fuchs square and the town hall from the mall am brand, connecting the inner city with the rhine banks. it, too, was part of the architectural concept that jacobsen and weitling created for the whole endeavour.
standing in a corner underneath that overhead bridge is this smashing dude - the eisenmann ( iron man ) or antimensch ( anti human ). he was created by polish artist zbigniew fraczkiewicz in 1986 ( he actually created a series of these which you can find in other german cities as well ) and came to mainz in 1989. it's supposed to show mankind in the straitjacket of industry, something i think is still relevant today. unfortunately the statue was relegated to a corner that is almost invisible to most, i guess it's hard to find an appropriate place for a 'monstrous' work like this. i feel it would fit well into a more industrial setting, maybe a factory of any kind.
anyway, i love this guy a lot, the details are super awesome and it reminds me of the movie tetsuo by shinya tsukamoto, where a guy converts himself into a man machine - a very cruel and horrifying movie, actually, but a masterpiece of japanese film art! i generally like the concept of man machines, i feel like it is a possible next step in our evolution at some point, though of course it is also a scary concept in a way for most of us. i don't even know if it would be such a good evolution in relation to the environment of our planet as well. BUT, technical enhancements for our bodies are already on the market for us and we have started such a process towards the direction of man-machines already ( i am thinking of robot legs and arms, artificially created inner organs and appendages to help us continue living etc. etc. ). while the iron man in mainz was intented to be a warning against industrialism and the shackles it can put upon us humans, i also see this sculpture in a different way, opening up thoughts about other possibilities and viewpoints. yes, a man machine is scary, but isn't he already an existential fact? i think it is worth to think about that question some more and determinate if we really should be scared of it, or if we are not already on a path towards accepting the reality of it.
the iron man has a pretty nice view towards the former heiliggeist infirmary ( now restaurant ). so, despite standing in a very strange corner, it still is visible to at least those people who get to dine here! i like that in this way, the iron man is not completely forgotten. the heiliggeist infirmary was erected in 1236 and is a late romanesque creation ( the oldest infirmary building in germany! ) that almost got destroyed and forgotten as well! in 1975 it re-emerged after being covered by other extensions and buildings and was restored to its former glory.
the last picture of my mainz walk was shot at the iron tower - another remnant of medieval fortifications ( 13th to 15th century ). inside, several local art associations have a place for exhibitions, it is now a space for the arts instead of being a guard tower or prison ( its past functions ).
next post i will return to nature again, to the taunus mountains ( which definitely is a heart place for me, a place i feel comforted by ).
until then, stay curious!
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