wow, i haven't written in quite a long time. it's already the first of 2015and it was 3 months ago when i was visiting my beloved baltic sea again. nothing much happened since then, but at the same time a lot has happened. i worked for one month in a different store but returned to my old one, because other people weren't pleased with the whole exchange. i'd have loved it to stay, but alas, i'm not stealing anybody's job. so returning to my old place happened and nothing changed. i still am overworked, but i continue to live. it is not my ideal place to be, i'd rather move away and start something i love, but it's a little bit difficult if you don't have a plan or any clue of what to do. i'm wasting a lot of time, i know, but i'm stuck. and in a situation like this i'd rather choose the lesser evil.
a cousin of mine died in the middle of november, november was especially a hard time because of that. i more or less just moved through the day without thinking a lot about what i was doing. i felt out of place a lot. i was at home a few times, none of the visits were particularly great. there's a layer of dust on everything, but i tried dusting things off. i felt alone much.
i continue to feel deserted and alone.
i've been crying an awful lot these last few months, even in public and it's annoying me, because i can't hold myself back anymore. i want to be strong and move forward and start something for myself, but i don't seem to possess this staunchiness other people my age seem to have.
but that should be enough for now, here are some photos from 3 months ago, when i was visiting the baltic sea. these photos were shot with my new camera, which i still have to figure out, too many options. it is fun, though.
on the first day of our stay, we visited the sealife in timmendorfer strand. it was rather small, but still very interesting! i especially loved these guys, they're japanese spider crabs.
lobster with monster claws.
these little guys were hiding in the sand and peaking out of it from time to time.
graceful lionfish, but poisonous as hell.
pastel coloured tentacles.
catsharks and crabs in friendly neighbourhood.
shark-fin soup has no taste, that's why it's flavoured with pork or chicken - a fact that i didn't know yet!
floating pink jellyfish.
we still had a lot of daytime left so we decided to visit karl's - an amusement farm where they sell lots of strawberry goods in the summer and in autumn, you guessed it: pumpkin related stuff. usually it is totally overcrowded, but on rainy days even i can be bothered to develop a liking for karl's - no crowds equals happy me. i can concentrate on my surroundings much better this way and appreciate the concept behind all of this a little bit better.
there was a pumpkin exhibition - with pumpkins from all over the world, from black and tiny to huge and grey. it is amazing how many different sorts of pumpkin exist on this earth.
in the evening we took a little walk by the beach. it was so good to be there again.
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